Don't Worry We'll Think of a Title (1966)

Starting today we’re going to do a week of turkeys for Thanksgiving which is Thursday. Things will run through next weekend and we’ll be looking at a bunch of films you probably should avoid.

First up the poisoned little confection Don’t Worry We’ll Think of a Title.

This awful little film was written by, produced by and stars Morey Amsterdam, best known as one of the supporting players from the Dick Van Dyke Show. He had a long career as a Hollywood gag man and as Borsht Belt Comedian. He was a funny guy who could really sell a joke, especially a bad one. He also could write a very funny joke…whole movies on the other hand were another matter.

Sorry Morey, I’ve now seen several films that you’ve written and none of them are really any good and Don’t Worry We’ll Think of a Title is probably the worst.

Shot at the Desilu studios around the time of the Dick Van Dyke show and starring Amsterdam’s Van Dyke co-stars Rosemarie and Richard Deacon, this film tells the story of a waitress who inherits a bookstore and goes off to run it. She is joined by her two co-workers and the trio fall into a nest of Cold War spies looking for a Soviet spaceman. It’s full of puns and spoofs and really bad, embarrassingly bad jokes. The film also has a ton of cameo’s from Danny Thomas, Carl Reiner, Forrest Tucker, Moe Howard, Granny from the Beverly Hillbillies (Not just the actress but the character) and several others.

Regrettably almost none of it works.

The jokes just lay there. I can’t be certain if the writing is what’s wrong or if it’s the direction since a good deal of this is similar to some of the nonsense that Laugh In put on the small screen a year or so later. I’m guessing that it’s the script since where Laugh In was quick cut joke next thing joke next thing joke next thing joke, this film has to continue on past what would have been the black out on TV or in vaudeville. It’s a long series of one liners strung together impossibly with the result the cast and the film strangles on the thing wire holding it all together.

This is awful and 15 minutes in I wanted to shut it off….but I didn’t figuring it can’t get worse…sadly it did.

Yes the cameos work, mostly because they are throw aways.

Not worth your time.

For those wishing to torture themselves or loved ones this is in the Turner Classics rotation